Insult and Injury

Billy says he loves dogs. He tells people to be nice to dogs, advocates for the animals' humane treatment. In turn, people see Billy as a good person. Good people are on the side of kindness after all. You see, however, Billy has a bit of a temper. He seems to get into arguments almost daily, usually about politics. When Billy gets mad, his automatic response is to call his opponent a dog. He does this with malice in his voice, as if being a dog is the lowest thing on earth. This makes Billy look rather hypocritical doesn't it?

The above is a sampling of something I find especially troubling about the 'progressive' mentality. Many times, I have witnessed a scorned progressive use verbal abuse and name-calling as an acceptable debate tactic. While the childish and inappropriate behavior is troubling in itself, something stands out to me as being worse than petty name-calling. Many of these warriors on the left use one particular jibe to pry at their enemies; they call them gay. Now do you see what I was getting at with Billy and the dogs?

Progressives love to trumpet how accepting and loving they appear to be. They wear social causes on their sleeves like bright neon ribbons. Somehow, the self-serving belief that everyone should be allowed their individuality is cause enough to deem someone a saint these days. Progressives make a point to tinge everything with a social hue. I won't say everyone left of the center is a hypocrite and everyone to the right is not, but why use something like 'gay' to deliver a childish blow in a political discussion if being gay is nothing to be ashamed of? Why use an ivory bastion of the progressive agenda to bludgeon an enemy you clearly despise? Do these people associate fondly with their homosexual friends and proceed to hunker down in front of a keyboard to hurtle 'gay' as a curse without blinking?

Dogs know when someone isn't right. They can sense all sorts of things. People aren't always so astute. I know I would never call someone a friend who used an aspect of my individuality as an insult when they became angry. As a matter of fact, I can't imagine why using any kind of insult is appropriate for an adult. Behavior like theirs, those two-faced vigilantes, is in no way respectful. All creatures deserve respect until they do something that justifies revoking that respect. I don't care what color you are, what gender, what age, or what orientation; human is human. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone gave such respect openly and truthfully?

Arnold's Fall: A Different Perspective

Do you have scars? I'm sure we all do. Maybe we burned ourselves cooking or skinned our knee one too many times. What about a scar that when you see it, you're reminded of a horrible mistake you made. Perhaps you catch a glimpse of it in the mirror and think, "Wow, why did I do that?" Now, imagine please that you are that scar, a constant reminder of a mistake. You're only in this world because of something that shouldn't have happened. This is how it feels to be a love child.

The news of Arnold Schwarzenegger's dissolving marriage was, to some, shocking enough. When the world learned what could be called the main reason for this split, the shock was amped up a few notches. The former governor of California had fathered a child with a staffer. This staffer continued to work in the home and Arnold had been monetarily supporting the child for 10 years. Arnold's wife, Maria Shriver, had no knowledge of this and when her husband came clean, she had simply had enough. The marriage is over, the family is hurt, and the admissions are being made, complete with shame and regret. Most would say this is the least that could be done for such infidelity, but there's more to the story.

People make mistakes all the time. Whether it be a simple one like forgetting to put the cap back on milk or a big one like choosing to have an extramarital tryst, mistakes happen. Humans aren't infallible and sometimes, even the most unassuming of people can surprise you. A few years after the death of my father, I learned the truth of who I was. I think I'd always known deep down, but that didn't make the news any easier to swallow. My mother had had a short-lived affair and had become pregnant. Both of my parents were older and my father (the man I knew as my father) had feared for their ability to support a baby at their age. He had suggested termination, but my mother refused.

The man I called Dad was truly my father. He raised me and loved me. It's possible he knew I didn't belong to him, but he never let on. He passed away when I was a senior in high school and that's when the phone calls started. A man I'd known only in small doses started calling my mother weekly, sometimes more. I searched my memory and came to the conclusion when I was to start my second year in college. I asked if this man was my real father and my mother said nothing. Sometimes silence is an answer.

I had never known a pain like that. It was like my entire life had been a lie. After the initial shock wore off, I began to think of how this must feel for my family, for the family of the man who was genetically my father. They had their affair, but broke it off, returning to their spouses and families. I was the only proof of what had happened, a scar to remind them of the mistake they made. I thought of the looks my mother had given me sometimes and how I never quite understood why they were different than the looks she gave my siblings. I remembered the sudden 'surprise' stashes of cash we would have when we needed money and finally knew where they'd come from. This man had been sending us money from the day I was born. I thought of the books I'd read, movies I'd seen, where a wayward couple had conceived a child, the shame they felt. I was that shame; I was a walking mistake.

A long time has passed since the day I learned the truth. I've come to terms with what I am. The man I always knew as my father will always be my father. I have cordial dealings with my biological, but it can never be much more. My siblings were understandably hurt when they were told and some kept a distance from me for a while, but they don't seem to mind now. Most of my extended family and acquaintances are unaware of the situation. I genuinely fear for what they'd think of my mother. I love my mother in spite of what she did and I can't stomach the thought of someone calling her the things I've seen people call Arnold and his accomplice in this transgression.

In the heat of the moment, when a story is at its peak in this society, it's easy to make snap judgements and play superior. What Arnold did was wrong, we know that. But it's important to remember there are others at play here. That child not only had guilt on its shoulders, but it is the human embodiment of guilt. Believe me, that's not easy to live with. And to hear everyone from news anchors to bloggers decry this child's existence as something of a crime, call its mother names, and God forbid, refer to it as a 'bastard', well, that's just a bridge too far. I was stepping into my 20s when I learned what I was and I can't imagine how horrible this must be for a child that young. Yes, this was a huge mistake, but remember in your criticisms there is an innocent kid out there bearing the brunt of all these missiles. I doubt even the child of Mr. Universe can long withstand that kind of barrage.

Sowing Seeds of Self Love

"The biggest problem we have in the world is lack of self love. Every cruelty comes from those who don't understand what they're worth!" -Jim Carrey

Mr. Carrey posted this on twitter recently, smearing his pompous ignorance on the computer and iPhone screens of millions of fans. With these two sentences, he proves he actually does know how to tell a joke. This joke is on him and all those who somehow find sense in his logic. Indeed, self love is the biggest problem we have, but a lack would only be the solution. Theodore Dalrymple on Self-Esteem versus Self-Respect states: "Self-esteem, it appears, is like money or health: you can't have too much of it." I think this is one of the reasons the 'self love' Mr. Carrey speaks of is such a pox on our society. Just like lusting after money, we have a need, an addiction to self-esteem. We crave prop-ups and pedestals, we thirst for mere ounces of praise and when we get them, we thirst for gallons. As the gallons come, we search for easier and easier ways to get more. Like Narcissus and his reflection, we've become unable to tear ourselves away... from ourselves.

Years of liberal indoctrination and preoccupation with 'self love' has seen to the formation of the 'entitlement gene'. This gene is passed from one self-esteem drunken moocher to the next by way of crippling stereotypes and baseless buzzwords. If you break down a great deal of the activism in our society today, you will always find overblown narcissism hiding under a rock in the background. Let's look at some examples.

• ACORN and other community-activist-type groups grew from the notion that by rights of ethnicity or degree of laziness, people are entitled to homes and sneaky tax breaks. We know now the lengths these people would go to in order to get their agenda across. The offenses range from advising a pimp on how to make his 'business' appear legitimate to the US government to registering dead and imaginary voters as default votes for Obama. There was nothing humble about ACORN. Everyone involved saw their cause justly because it's what they would want from the world. Why would they advise law-breaking prostitution-peddlers to clean up their act when they themselves live on the stolen rewards of other people's hard work? Why would they be equal in their voter canvasing when they know the 'other guy' makes no promises where entitlement is concerned? Every decision, every bit of advice, came from their darkened heart of self-adoration.

• Feminist organizations come from the same stock. Most believe women deserve certain things just for being women. If a woman and man were up for the same job, the woman should automatically get the job even though the man may be more qualified. And why would someone believe that? Simple. These women know that's what they would want. They know genuine respect comes from genuine hard work and frankly, they're not ready to do that hard work. They look in the mirror and hear the oft-whispered mantras "women are special, things are harder for women so the world must make consolations, women deserve to this respect because they're women." Humility teaches that in order to surmount obstacles, you must work harder. Vanity uses non-issues as crutches to hop undeservedly into the 'special' line.

• Anti-war fanatics, aside from being grossly undereducated in history and civics, are usually the kind of people who wish nothing more than to rule as dictators over their own life and the lives of those around them. Their crusade against war is a surrogate for the battle they are afraid to wage against their own insecurity. Facing up to the truth of the world would mean facing up to the possible lies they live by and that's just not easy for people who think the world tips on them as an axis. War is a mirror and these people prefer only the mirror that tells them they're the fairest in the land.

Communists, socialists, and entitlement junkies everywhere are little more than vain children. How else could you explain someone's belief that the spoils of hard work and dedication of someone like Bill Gates belongs to them when they've done nothing to deserve it? When I think of entitlement, I recall the folk tale 'The Little Red Hen.' The hen works at planting wheat, cultivating it, harvesting it, and baking to produce a loaf of bread. From the planting stages to the work of baking, she asks for help from her farm friends who all simply say "Not I." When the bread has been baked, the friends are more than happy to help the hen eat it. She, in efforts to teach her friends the errors of their selfish and lazy ways, refuses to share her bread.

Our society today is so poisoned by entitlement it's hard to imagine a future without it. But we must soldier on. Peace, charity, hard work, all of these things have a requirement so many refuse to fulfill: humility. On the hard-labor-bended backs and in the blister-peppered hands of those before us, our country has been carried in humility. Wars have raged, tensions abroad and at home have waxed and waned, tragedies, both man-made and natural have tested us, and we have remained. We must now concoct an anecdote to the self-love epidemic that ails us. We must replace selfish esteem with self respect. You reap what you sow, not what others sow for you. The entitlement gene is pushing the American ideal into extinction. Now is the time to sow humility and accountability before all that remains is ashes and dust.

To Catch a Predator

There are various schools of thought on the psychological impetus for abuse. The most prevalent postulates children who are abused, whether it be emotionally, physically, or sexually, are more prone to becoming abusers themselves. Some theorize that abuse is a 'learned' behavior brought on by stressors. In recent weeks, some have linked the abuse scandals in the Catholic church to the priestly vow of celibacy. In an answer to a 'chicken and egg' question, they've said celibacy causes these men to abuse children. Others believe it isn't the cause, but can certainly add to the stress. I personally don't believe the vow itself causes abuse, but celibacy is only the tip of an iceberg that looms beyond the Vatican's bow.

Celibacy and other 'small d' doctrines of Catholicism, have served not to preserve a humble order, but to propagate one of caste elitism. The 'few and proud' mentality has created a group of demi-gods who reject the 'failings' of humanity in order to become ultimate moral leaders. Clerical hierarchy attitudes can be reprehensible in their hypocrisy, but the attitudes of the 'flock' only exacerbate the problem. People teach their children from birth the members of holy orders are earth-bound saints, incapable of evil and demanding of wordless assent. Children grow to view these figures in a skewed way, not merely as learned elders but as something else entirely.

Leaders and flock alike continue to pantomime an inhuman view of things that are all too human. Perhaps this is one of the major failings of the Catholic church. Having been to the heart of Catholicism, Vatican City, I can attest to the bedazzling royal presentation. St. Peter's alone is the most decorated and imposing place I've ever seen. This basilica doesn't at all convey humility, but rather dominance. Standing in the square, one can feel the oppression, the overwhelming sense that the people who walk those halls believe they are the kings of all things corporeal. Kings who, when given the unconditional support of their followers, feel they have transcended humanity.

So how can a place so perfect, a church so divine, be a haven for men (and sometimes women) who do terrible things to children? I believe the answer lies in the aforementioned psychology. No matter how abusers develop, one trait is present in almost every case, the need for the abuser to dominate. Bullied by their parents, siblings, peers, whomever; these people need to be powerful. They feed on control. Positions of power such as law enforcement, military, and education often seem like an easy way to get that control. The clergy are powerful too and oftentimes clerical power is a position that requires little more than knowledge of doctrine. Too weak, meek, or scared to be in law enforcement or the military? Not patient or extroverted enough to be a teacher? If you study any kind of religion, the answer is obvious. How better to control people than to lead their soul? Nearly every idiosyncrasy will be explained away and accepted as a gift from God. There's almost no accountability. Human laws don't apply.

Some may argue that seminarians go through rigorous psychological evaluations, thus eliminating the potential for abusers to enter the priesthood, but it's not that simple. Almost everyone knows, the best way to catch anything is with the right bait. No amount of psychological testing can eliminate something the church has set itself up to catch in the first place. The Catholic patriarchal system is uniquely tooled to attract those who seek dominance and power. And whether these people choose to emotionally abuse those who trust them young and old or sexually abuse children, the perfect storm of storied divinity, opulent power, and 'fall on your sword' vows make the Catholic Church a collection of emboldened people with severe inferiority complexes.

The Catholic church has a lot of work to do. They must deal with abuse in a manner fitting the crime. No more hiding, no more pardoning, no more whispers. God said the truth would set us free, so tell the truth. And while they do this, they must reevaluate their mindset. A serious look at the discontinuation of celibacy is only the beginning. They must examine their attitude, their means of recruitment, and the kinds of people they're trying to attract. Do they want responsible, even tempered leaders with good values who happen to seek leadership as married clerics or do they want trolls in cassocks who care nothing for love and marriage but instead wish to dominate and destroy? Is an image and an antiquated tradition so important that they would obliterate the loyalty of their future flock to save face?

I was emotionally abused by a priest who desired nothing more than starry-eyed admiration from everyone he met. He didn't care what he had to do to get that admiration. Being a new convert to the church, I had none of the 'cradle Catholic' stigma that kept me from seeing him not as a god, but as a man. Still, I was hypnotized by his power and weakened by my own insecurities. I was eventually able to remove myself from the situation before the abuse became too much to bear. But one thing was clear to me: implied reverence means nothing. The uniform you wear, the letters before your name, they're irrelevant compared to who you are inside. In Matthew 11:29, Jesus says "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." Part of humility is accepting the truth. In spite of what the Catholic church believes, man is not divine, not even close. They must accept the truth that power corrupts and adjust accordingly.